Movie Review: Twilight – New Moon

Yes, I am a heterosexual male and still saw Twilight: New Moon.  I am so on Team Jacob.  Mostly because he is going out with Taylor Swift and I’d let her ruin my life.  Also, because werewolves are cooler than vampires.  And Edward is a melodramatic puss.

No, I’ve never read these books.  And I never will.  I saw this out of work related curiosity.  It was fairly well-made, more so than the first one.  I think getting rid of Hardwicke was a good move, as I don’t think for a second she could have handled the visual fx.  However, I think the acting in the first one was probably better.  That falls on Chris Weitz’ shoulders.  There are scenes were the acting is laughably bad – mostly from Taylor Lautner.  And I don’t blame him, cause there are other scenes where his acting is strong.  On the upside, it appears as if Weitz used the same company that did the creatures in Golden Compass, which is a good thing – cause the wolves look great and their transformation were amazing.

But was the movie any good?  No.  Part of the charm of the first one was the running time.  Under 90 minutes.  This was like 2.5 hours.  And for no reason.  It could have played at under 100 minutes.  Definitely under 2 hours.  The over-the-top parallels to Romeo & Juliet were nauseating.  The opening shot of the movie she wakes up and the book is next to her head.  A scene in class that same day and they are watching the movie in class, and Edward even quotes from it.  Really?

The biggest problem for me in this movie – it is supposed to be a love triangle between Bella-Jacob-Edward.  They set up that Jacob gets Bella out of her funk, and she even writes to Alice about how Jacob fills the hole in her chest/heart.  But when they’re together – you never actually feel that she has fallen for Jacob.  So when Edward returns – or Jacob asks her to stay for him – it’s falling on the audience’s deaf ears because it never seemed like that was a choice.

Side note – Ashley Green is actually hotter in person than in the movie.  Which is saying a lot.  I’d let her ruin my life too.  In fact, would have when she was the shmoopy faced hostess at The Belmont.

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